College Essays

I think I'm going to start using this as a jumping point. For college essays. Which are really frustrating. I don't think LiveJournal is really appropriate for that. I feel like LiveJournal for me has become a way to stay connected to the people I've lost connection with, and it just feels forced.

Today I ____.
I feel ____ about this.
Tomorrow I ____.
Life is ____.

It's sort of really trite, but then again, everything sort of is.

I just feel so drained. Last year, when I wrote that personal essay about the moonbounce... I feel like that was the last time I really wrote. I wrote that thing about the clown, but it wasn't about me at all. It resonated with my voice, I suppose. I liked it. But it wasn't about me, about what i was feeling (at least not directly).

I miss that feeling I felt with the moonbounce. Whenever I read it, I felt like I felt in the essay. That doesn't make much sense, but I understand it.

I wish I could just write without feeling the need to scrutinize. See? Even with that sentence I wanted to type "edit". Actually, I did. Then I went back and replaced it.

Okay so. My observations for last night/today so far:

- Why can the government tell parents to encourage their kids to wait until marriage to have sex? I feel like that relates too much to religion. Grabenstein would kill me. Yes, laws and government actions are brought on by morals, but morals are so intertwined with religion that it's ridiculous. What other reason would the government have to encourage abstinence before marriage? Of course they could argue that it would lead to less spread of STDs and unwanted pregnancies therefore abortions, but studies show that the correlation isn't as strong as you would think.

- How original can you really be? Bauld keeps saying that application readers want something fresh and alive. But if everyone starts taking Baulds advice (like I am technically right now), wouldn't that just mean that the readers have to endure essay after essay of fleshy, lively people? Besides, everything has been done once.

That's why I love Garden State. There's that one part where she does something that no one else has done before. A sound, a movement, a scream, a jump, a physicalization of her originality because she's become too bored. She needs to feel like she's her own person again, so she does something that could have her labeled as insane.

I love that. I feel like we all need to feel that.

- The snooze button has become the bane of my existance. It once served me as tool to help facilitate my waking up every morning. Now, it's just doing the opposite. The alarm goes off at 5 AM, and procedes to do so every nine minutes as I hit it continually. I really should get up at 6 AM so I can shower. But I don't even realize that I've hit the button ten or so times. By the time I really wake up, it's 6:30 AM and I have fifteen minutes to shower and get ready. It's becoming a problem. I really need to get two alarm clocks, and stop relying on the snooze button.



I feel like this is it for now. I don't think anyone reads this, but that's cool. If anyone does, though, feedback would be sort of nice.